Repudiate – to refuse to accept something or someone as true, good, or reasonable.

In the case of receiving radical Black women– the kind who are brilliant, confident, and courageous enough to speak truth to power – America has never fared well.  In fact, it has fared horribly.  White America has always treated these types of women as problems to be dealt with.  Rather than being covered and protected, these women are repudiated – gaslit, threatened, shamed, and blacklisted to the outskirts where they presumably belong.  

There was Shirley Chisolm back in the 60’s and 70’s.  The trailblazer created over fifty pieces of legislation championing racial equality, gender equality, and the plight of the poor.  In return, America thanked her with three death threats.  

In 1968, The White House invited Eartha Kitt for a lunch meeting on juvenile crime and delinquency.  When asked her opinion, she clarified that American youth were not delinquent, but rather angry with a war –the Vietnam War – that they did not understand. As a reward for her honesty, the CIA chased her out of the country.  Her career suffered for ten years as she was blacklisted in America and forced to survive in Europe.  

Then again in 1991 attorney, Anita Hill, testified that Supreme Court Justice nominee, Clarence Thomas had sexually harassed her.  Despite Anita having passed a polygraph test and providing multiple witnesses to support her claims, Thomas was confirmed to the court by a vote of 52-48. Hill, on the other hand, received death threats and a complete shift in her livelihood.  

Indeed, America is unkind to outspoken, opinionated, honest, Black women. 

While White America can often be unrelenting in its treatment of Black women, one might expect that Black America would have a softer touch.  Given our collective experiences of being unheard, undervalued, and even unrecognized as human beings, we might be more inclined to operate through a lens of compassion, understanding, and acceptance when one of our own speaks truth to power. Right?

However, after viewing the public discourse regarding Amanda Seales and her guest appearance on Club Shay Shay with Shannon Sharpe, I’m afraid we, Black America, have a long way to go. 

A multi-hyphenate genius

Where does one begin to describe a talent like Amanda Seales? Many of us came to know her for her role as “Tiffany” on the hit HBO series, Insecure; however, Amanda has been in the game for over three decades.  Her cred list runs LONG!  Not only an actress and comedian, Amanda is also an African American studies scholar, with a graduate degree from Columbia University. She’s a social justice activist and a philanthropist. She’s written one book, hosted the BET Awards, and sang in the second iteration of the R&B group, Floetry.  She can DJ.  She can rap.  She can even paint! And I’m not talking about throwing a few flecks on a canvas.  The woman is a fine artist! Take a look at one of her pieces below:

Some people get all the talent . . . 

The Amanda I know

I first met Amanda in 2013, at an event hosted by The Women in Entertainment Empowerment Network.  She was moderating a panel, while I attended hoping to make a few industry connections.  After the event, I approached her and asked for her card.  She didn’t know me from a can of paint but kindly obliged.  

A few days later, I emailed Amanda about my non-profit organization, The Role Model Group.  Our mission was to use the influence of the fashion and entertainment industries to equip teen girls with character, self-esteem, and leadership skills.  I asked Amanda if she would be willing to host our upcoming Bids 4 Bachelors event to raise funds for the organization.  I knew it was a long shot. We didn’t have a budget and it would serve her in no way to support our event.  

To my surprise, Amanda came through. She not only replied but agreed to host the event — for FREE!  

But her generosity didn’t stop there.  Amanda returned to support our organization the following year by hosting our annual back-to-school fashion show held at Center City Mall.  This time, I offered her $500 (beans, really), because although we were a non-profit, I believed in paying people. She agreed to journey from NYC to Paterson, NJ to support our event.  Of course, the crowd was pleased with her MC skills.

That evening, there was a hiccup in Amanda’s travel arrangements back home and I was next in line to drive her back from Jersey to her apartment in the Bronx. For whatever reason, I vividly remember one exchange. 

As we drove, my mind had been swirling recapping the fashion show and compiling my list of post-event to-dos. I was driving my mother’s Toyota Camry and because my parents are sports fans, the radio had been programmed to a major league baseball game. 

Five minutes into the drive Amanda called out my peculiar radio programming, “Kaity, you a Yankees fan or something? Why are we listening to baseball?”  

Indeed, it was an odd selection for me.  Typically, I would have been listening to Hot 97, but at that moment, I was distracted, in my head, and not thinking about the radio or what my passenger would prefer.

Her candor snapped me out of my haze.  I laughed and explained my distraction.  We spent the rest of the ride getting to know one another and discussing men and dating.  Somehow, it always goes back to men and dating … 

The Amanda Seales I met was generous, kind, and concerned about the kids.  She was candid, authentic, and called it like she saw it.  She helped our organization out of the goodness of her heart because – I believe – she believes in doing the right thing.

Club Shay Shay

Amanda’s appearance on Club Shay Shay was honestly hard to watch.  She made us laugh and took us to class on autism, racism, and the history of Hip Hop, while Shannon stumbled and fumbled over his words. 

While discussing autism, he says, “Yes, but Amanda, sometimes, you know, just because you have a special gift,  that doesn’t mean that, you know, you have a spectrum or you have a, just because you see things differently, it doesn’t mean that you’re on the spectrum or you…”

Sir, what? Both Sharpe’s point and the intention behind his point were hard to understand.  What was this man trying to say? Was he questioning her autism diagnosis?

Then came the invalidation.  Amanda shared about a childhood experience in which she was sent to the principal for correcting a teacher who referred to aborigines as a “Stone Age people.” Although Amanda is a known human rights activist and Black Studies scholar, Sharpe countered that perhaps what she had encountered had not been racism, but rather a typical adult response to disrespect from a child. 

“If a white child would have corrected her, I think most teachers would feel some type of way if a child corrects them.” 

Despite his claims that his basement is a “safe space”, Sharpe essentially sided with the teacher. 

Rather than using his space to support and validate his guest, he speculated against her word — and later asked for a hug. 

Black America’s Response.

Since the interview I’ve seen posts calling Amanda a narcissist, think pieces diagnosing her with a personality disorder, and comments expressing pure disdain for her as a person — all courtesy of Black America.

Issa Rae and her publicist, Marsha Ambrosius, her boss at Sirius XM, her high school teacher, and her college leadership – Amanda shared stories of various people who had wronged her throughout her life.   In return, a sizable group of viewers speculate that she must be the problem. Because how can one person be innocent, yet have beef with so many?  

These collective comments came from the same Black Americans who rallied in support of Katt Williams after he aired out half of Black Hollywood.   Rickey Smiley, Steve Harvey, Cedric the Entertainer, Earthquake, Faizon Love, Tiffany Haddish, Michael Blackson, Diddy, and Kevin Heart were just a few of his victims. 

Katt appeared on Club Shay Shay back in January to set the record straight about industry veterans who’ve wronged him over the years. He also shared about his childhood and reading 3000 books per year between 8 and 12 years of age.  He revealed that at 52 years old, he can sprint a 4.4 forty-yard dash.  Sharpe never challenged any of these stories – not one.

“Katt might tell a joke, but he won’t tell a lie.” 

Black America rewarded Katt’s candor with unrelenting support.  He became regarded as the straight-shooting, American treasure sent to uncover Hollywood secrets.  His quotables flooded the internet. 

“You having a natural allegiance to losers is not like you.”

 “It’s God’s side and the other side.” 

Katt’s next Netflix Special, Katt Williams: Woke Foke, will air live on May 4th.

Man Vs. Woman

Two amazingly talented and gifted individuals appeared on the same program – both unapologetically Black.  Both proclaimed to tell the truth.  Both revealed a laundry list of individuals and how they’d been wronged, personally and professionally.   Both confidently proclaimed an above-average level of intellect. Both conveyed equal parts hilarity and rage. 

Yet one was praised and affirmed; the other repudiated and invalidated.

Truly, gender is the only factor setting the two apart.

Misunderstood and Unprotected

During her interview, Amanda asked that we follow two main themes: misunderstood and unprotected. Driving her point home, there are moments during which she holds back tears, literally crying out for someone to understand and protect her. 

Yet it appears that, once again, Black America has missed the point.

You see, men are allowed to be courageous, confident, and even arrogant – these are necessary parts of modern masculinity.  However, those same characteristics in a woman – particularly a Black woman – are simply unacceptable. 

Whenever a Black woman is bold enough to call people on their BS or speak truth to power, she becomes “the problem”.  When she demands what she deserves, she’s labeled difficult.  She becomes a pariah when she refuses to tap dance for the powers that be – or “play the game” as Sharpe called it. 

It happened to Eartha Kitt. It happened to Anita Hill.  It even happened to Monique.  And now it’s happening to Amanda Seals.

Rather than rallying behind these radical individuals and understanding that America is often unkind to Black women, we doubt, shame, and criticize them. Rather than receiving their stories with curiosity and compassion, we fill their comment sections with hate. 

We need to do better. 

The Heart of the Matter

As a therapist, it’s my job to understand people and I can confidently say that we’ve only begun to scratch the surface of Amanda’s story. I’m curious about what makes her radical, impassioned, and at times full of rage.  It’s likely that behind all of that exterior is a girl who simply wants to do right by the world — and have the world do right by her.  

Such is the case for most radical Black Women. 

If this piece made you think, please leave a comment and share on your social media. I would love to hear from you! ~Kaity